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10/02/14 Thank you for reading my blog. Yesterday my decision was made concerning my relationship with the Mistress and my being sub to her in her room. We were unable to agree on me not being fully sub in her room. As a result I left I no longer go there. I was concerned before the decision how I would fee. Twice before I had tried to be her sub and it had not worked out. Both of those times I felt very bad when I could no longer serve her. There seemed to be a great loss in my life. This time was different. I actually felt good once the change had been made. It felt like a weight had been lifted from me. As I told someone later when we were talking - it was the fest I had felt in weeks. Maybe this time will be the one and I will no longer want to serve her. I would like to be friendly with her but I am not sure that is possible, at least in the short run. I am sure that I will still miss being with her but that is human nature. I do wish her all the best, as I always have. I guess it is not in my nature to be that total sub. I am now back to being amber the switch and am very happy with that. As always I hope I learned something about me from this experience. amber |
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