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The next time... The Dungeon... So many firsts.... so.. i was naive... to be expected i guess.... When I told you I was expecting my monthly cycle, You said if i was bleeding that weekend You wouldn't share me but have me for Yourself... We met as arranged, I was nervous, terrified even, our second meeting, a whole night ahead of Us.. I told You how i was feeling... You pulled my head to Your neck, whispering in my ear 'you can always go, go home, be safe, if that is what you really want?' ... I shook my head, I'd wanted You to soothe me, persuade me.. But I realise now that You would never do that, it had to be my choice, I had to 'own' my desires and I to want all that lay ahead.... We walked through the town, you were silent at first, then You took my hand saying with a small smile ' I want You to see something, to watch, something not for you tonight, I have a very different evening planned for you'.... I found this re-assuring, I could observe, not take part, maybe a film, You had often spoken of movies We would watch together.... even as we walked into the building that was still forefront in my mind... it wasn't until You put the blindfold on me and disappeared for a few minutes that the realisation hit it me, this was no film night.. Wandering through the town, reaching the narrow back streets, a plain door in a white wall, no sign, no number... You opened it and lead me into a side room... I looked around quickly, a bed, a shower, dark walls, dim lighting.... Before I take in any more of my surroundings You pushed me to the wall, I felt velvet drapes behind me... You kissed me hard, hungrily then tied a blindfold tight around my eyes... A collar around my throat, a lead attached..... I heard You murmur... 'Don't move, wait there'. I froze to the spot, my body on high alert, struggling to slow my breathing... I could hear You moving about, loud noises, a wooden door, music playing.... Your hands on my shoulders guiding me forwards and down steps, steep wooden steps... The music loud, covering any other noises... Reaching the hard ground, taking my trembling hands and walking me forwards.... Turning me and pushing me back... I felt boards, a cross behind me... You lifted my wrists, buckled them tight up and to the sides... Then Your hands wandered over my body, hitching up my dress, fingers running down my legs, placing my ankles apart and cuffing them to the Cross.... I pulled slightly testing the restraint, I was bound... Blindfolded, hearing just music... You caressed me then, easing my tits from my bra, pulling my dress down so they were free... My nipples were instantly hard, aching... My torso moving as much as possible to feel Your touch.... You removed my blindfold, face close to mine, smiling, then You stepped to the side... My eyes adjusted to the dim light..... I saw her... Hands tied... lifted over her head, body stretched.. Rope through a hook on the ceiling... She was dressed, her clothes dishevelled, skirt hitched around her waist, knickers around her ankles, her blouse undone, breasts falling free, like my own... Her back was facing me, but there was a mirrored wall before her so I could her blindfold eyes, flushed face, head hanging forward... And so it began..... You chose Your implements, a plug lubed and stuffed in her arse, a flogger, a whip, a paddle.... I was scared, I was excited... You started tormenting her.. I could see she had been well 'warmed up' for the colour of her ass cheeks and titmeat..... I was shocked at the force You released on her.... The cries and moans from her lips reassuring me of her pleasure.... i loved watching.. You and her... i could feel the draught from the flogger over my skin.. i could feel myself straining towards it... i enjoyed watching her flinch, my mind split between wanting it to be me and and grateful it wasn't.... i also have this nurturing/maternal instinct, 'the mother tiger' even, part of me that yearned to sooth her, make it better, even if she was ready for more.... And later in the evening that 'tiger/protection' switch that i had to keep turned'off', to stop myself begging You to desist, the desire to protect her so strong.... Even later that night You wanted me lying over her, using her body for,support, finger fucking her hard...it was so hard for me, every part of my own body feels geared to not hurting another women, a younger woman, a vulnerable women, even if that's whats they want... yet the other side of that coin is the struggle i have submitting to a women, its that huge maternal instinct i have that doesn't readily allow me to become vulnerable to a women, it makes me need to be the strong one, well emotionally strong at least.... that said though i love women's bodies (not as much as Mens'!) and wanted more of hers.... You stopped and walked over to me... Watching my reactions, hand inside my panties, feeling my arousal and grinning.... The blindfold back on, music louder, then another wait.... Only a few minutes, yet felt an age..... Hands releasing me, You guiding me, leading me to the sofa, hands on my shoulders pushing me to kneel.... I could feel You sit down in front of me... You reached for my hand and rested it on Your groin, Your cock so hard... I began to feel to,stroke and You reached for my other hand, resting it next to You, on anothers thigh, guiding it upwards to another's stiff shaft.... My mind in a whirl... Stroking at both cocks, telling myself not to panic, to just feel it, go with it...... then You took my blindfold off.... I remember hands, mouths, kissing,,sucking, coaxed from One to the Other....... the constant hold of the lead.... then You told me to undress...... The rest a blur... a delicious surrealism... mouths, hands, cocks... the security of the lead... Feeling myself flitting from one 'self' to another.... sometimes heady with lust, sometimes feeling sooo inadequate. .... sometimes just drowning in pleasure.. You told me to dance....... my brain stalled, i kept telling myself You would see i couldn't.. i froze... then finally the old fight or flight drive kicked in and flight wasn't an option.... and as much as i'm sorry i couldn't do it, for i did so want to try and give You reason to be proud, I just couldn't, I grabbed the lead in my hand, wrenching it from Your grasp, shouting 'I can't..... I imagined You'd be angry, but You gathered me onto Your lap, stroking me, ssshhing me, offering Your cock for me to,suckle and calm.... The Other guy said ' she's a spirited one,that needs some taming'.... You replied simply 'not taming, releasing'. I heard the words and knew You understood me.... The rush of adrenalin i got from my little lash out fuelled me for the rest of the evening.... seems I could be up for a fight sometimes.... The Other guy eventually left.. He teased and tormented the other girl, fucked us both, abused her.... He held my thighs open while You forced my climax with Your glass dildo.... i understand Your trust in Him.. though different, i felt YOUR 'foundations' matched... i felt safe with You both....... i said goodbye to 'The other' with a smile... soon after that it got all 'fucked up' as You said... i felt such a novice, i've not had that experience, i didn't know the dynamics, how to make them work... The girl was clearly needing Your attentions... i was feeling lost, inadequate, that i had failed, yet it became apparent that You and she were going through something yourselves, so i did what i always do, shut my own response down... i don't cry, i don't cling, i don't demand, i don't need You settled her upstairs and left me in the dungeon on the bed..... You went out for a walk... i was seething with anger, resentfulness, not at You or the others, but at myself.. for putting myself in that situation, for thinking i could do it... i felt foolish for getting myself 'trapped' , not able to leave, i was even wondering if You were going to return.. i decided i'd go and drive somewhere, park up and nap or read til i was able to go home and then realised i didn't know where my belongings were....... You came back.... and lying there with You, touching, something happened, if i were a 'fey' type i'd say magical... then the rest didn't matter... it was beautiful.. we were....... i'll stop writing now, seems a good point to pause and reflect... A x |
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Golly! A lot to reflect on! Beautiful to read. Thank you. 
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It was quite overwhelming... But an amazing first private dungeon experience..... It could of turned out many different ways, I really could of just 'watched' if I had wanted! X
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That makes me happy!!!! X
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Thank You Seo... It's only actions into words... Just hope to do the feelings justice x
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