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My Blog

Welcome to my blog!

The use of the word Victim
Posted:Oct 21, 2014 7:57 pm
Last Updated:Mar 29, 2024 5:50 am
18351 Views

I see all this support for victims and as I say hooray, I have a sullen feeling in the pit of my stomach because victimization goes in many directions.

People want to try to lump victims into one category but it can not be done because there are many categories of Victims.... People don't like to dissect this word ....

Victim- The one who has had their trust violated or they have been physically emotionally or other wise harmed. My heart goes out for them there they were just minding their own business and out of now where a random act of evil came upon them and hurt them. I support them because I'm Human and I love people. I can feel their hurt and I can feel their pain.

Victims of inexperience- The saying is if you don't want to be in that situation don't put yourself there... It goes a long way... Now I still believe these people are Victims and should be supported, cared for fought for and loved I will say there were some decisions that were made that probably weren't the best and that person needs to learn from these to heal and not be victimized again. They still require support they are Victims

Victims of circumstance-This happens a lot when the people know each other. Things are on the rocks, things are not well communicated, feelings get hurt and people lash out typically in a very public way. I'm not saying that all situations are this I'm saying when they are when the gray gets deep and people start to form opinions due to resentment, emotional hurts or because needs were not met.

Victim of allegations .... These people fall into the victim pool if the allegations are not solid and substantial. I have seen these people and it saddens me they are the socially weak and come off creepy. They are black balled because people are just not comfortable around them. These are the creepy on the play ground that everyone stayed away from as . They weren't removed from school we weren't warned of them we just stayed away. We are adults if you don't like some one well stay away from them don't go asking to remove them... They might need the education more than others in which case isn't better to keep them in eye sight then unleash these people on the world for newbies to stumble upon.

Association Victims- That is the people who have to encounter the safety speech over and over again because this always seems to be a problem. Society is a victim in this case. Where do laws come from well to protect people. Regulations and laws are helpful however can get out of hand just the way protecting can get out of hand. We trade our freedom for safety a lot in this country look at the government.

Why did I list these....This is a hot button topic and people are taking out of context the actual meaning. The meaning behind most of what I read is good and good people are writing it, but they are being slammed over the use of the word Victim. People tend to go a little over board over the word Victim but it is not always a black and white situation. It can be a very tangled web. People don't always look at all the angles. We are all victims in one form or another everyday. That is why it is our responsibility to keep ourselves as safe as we can. There is no one who cares about you as much as you do.

These are just forms of victims... there are probably many more I could list and I'm sure you could list but before you start throwing research and statistics at me this is just a ramble. This is my writing and you can post what you like and drag me over the coals. That is fine everyone has an opinion I welcome yours as obviously you read mine.Just because you disagree doesn't mean you get to be rude or snarky or take out of context what I'm saying.... I will not allow you to Victimize me...
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Sitting in the Shadows
Posted:Oct 13, 2014 7:44 pm
Last Updated:Nov 2, 2014 5:29 pm
18474 Views

She watches and looks but no one stands out… when someone does stand out he quickly disappoints her. The disappointment is not on purpose it’s the world we find ourselves in but she was taught a long time ago “Don’t make someone your priority when you are just their option”

She feels a lack of connection with most; very seldom does she find someone that ignites a flame that makes her yearn to submit. She is strong as she continues her journey everyday aware of her void that grows bigger and deeper. It is this void that makes her careful and distant with most. She takes time like a during breaking a need to be seen from all sides before trust can be given, sometimes she hands over her reins just to see what might happen… not very often does it work out for her and this has only been done a couple times each time makes it harder than the time before. To her the investment is important on all sides and one must invest before a return can be given.
She has been there before in the beginning as she learned of herself in this new world were it was ok to be selectively vulnerable. A vulnerability she felt ashamed to show before and is still a challenge to show, most get to see the Tomboy never getting to see the Princess… taught to be strong, emotionally solid not needy or whiny.. She was taught it was weak to ask for things but then told she needed to communicate. She made terrible decisions then and learned to protect this gift and not let it be exploited. Sometimes late at night it gets the better of her and tears fall on her pillows but then she opens her eyes to a new day and pushes on…. Why because that is what is expected of her.

This is the life she wants but it would be her biggest challenge to find vanilla no longer quenches her thirst. It stays on her mind almost every minute of everyday. She doesn't want to play she wants to be able to give herself fully and this would be the most risky proposition of her life and guarded because of its power. The same thing she longs for also has the ability to Destroy her, Mark her, Scar her and she is aware very much aware… That is why she sits in the shadows and watches.
1 comment
I will Not Settle
Posted:Sep 7, 2014 8:50 pm
Last Updated:Mar 29, 2024 5:50 am
19336 Views

I will not settle as I do not expect others to settle upon me or to try to change who I am to fit their ideal of the perfect mate. They can have expectations of me and I can and will compromise on somethings and as you get to know me you will quickly find out what those things are. I'm not made of my make-up or my clothes, Materials are easily gotten and easily forgotten.

I will not change someone ... I can inspire but it goes only that far.... It is a personal choice how someone lives their life and I will not interfere with that. I don't want to lead a man I prefer to fall under his guidance. I work hard to keep my life balanced and at times wonder if this is a forgotten art. I can not be with someone who is unable to handle their life. Decisions are hard to make for all and I am not exception to this rule but I have to make them. I have to stick by them and take responsibility for them when they go belly up. AS should the person I'm with. I can give input but I'm not here to give you answers. I will work with you to accomplish a goal but you have to invest yourself in that goal too.

I need to be inspired... Lets face it life gets mundane and we all need inspiration. I am a very deep person and will pull inward at times...I need someone with the ability to push me when I need to be pushed or to pull me in and tighten the reins when I start going to far. WE all need work as life is always in continuous motion. We never stop evolving and changing. I hold high standards for myself but I need the challenge of raising the bar. I need to work for your acceptance and the praise I receive. I'm of the mind set anything easy doesn't have the same sense of accomplishment for me. I have to aspire to be something of pride to hold. I want to sparkle and shine under the hands of someone who will accept no less.

I like to explore and have adventure. I need someone who has the ability to pull me from my life and show me life. Have me read a book take interest is who I am and where I'm going in life..

The person for me will be able to wear many hats and take advantage of the many hats I'm able to wear. I will always give my best efforts. I'm strong and able to handle a lot but to feel protected. I need to feel if I have a need you will keep me secure. If I fall you will catch me. If the world gets to be too much I can hide at your feet and turn over the pain to you. If I'm wrong I will be called on it and corrected .

In return for this I will always do my best to meet and exceed your expectations.I will take the time to learn you, so not everything need command but to anticipate what you would prefer or like. If I'm wrong I am willing to be corrected for it so I may learn on a deeper level.
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