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My Magazine > Editors Archive > Advice > Role-playing: Be All You Can Be -- Or Anything You Want To Be
Role-playing: Be All You Can Be -- Or Anything You Want To Be   by Bill Reed

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You lay on the table, your feet in the stirrups. You hear the snap as I put on my gloves, having just completed an overall exam. I place the cold, lubricated speculum at the entrance of your vagina, pushing it gently inside. I open the speculum, spreading you wide, increasing the vulnerable yet somewhat arousing feeling.

Ever wanted to play Doctor? A few dollars for a disposable speculum, gloves, lube, enema bag, a stethoscope. This has all of the makings of a fun night of role-play and fantasy fulfillment.

Role-playing is something that many couples use to enhance their sex lives as well as their relationships as a whole. This is true for vanilla couples as well as couples in the BDSM lifestyle.

I was at a demo a while back that was an interrogation scene. One participant was playing the role of a military interrogator and the other was playing a prisoner of war. The interrogator laid the groundwork by asking the prisoner to simply say a name. It did not have to be a certain name and none was provided, just simply say any name. The scene began with the prisoner tied to a chair. She was nude and there were various torture implements on a table nearby in plain view. The interrogator asked her who the other spy was. She said various things from she didn’t know to there are no others. The scene progressed and the “torture” became more intense. Canes, clamps, impact instruments, all came into play. About 45 minutes into this, she finally blurted out a name to ease the torture. It was a very hot, consensual scene.

The scenarios are endless. It does not matter if it is for an enhancement to sex or for the acting out of fantasies in a Power Exchange. We all have fantasies and we each have the ability to act them out in a safe, consensual manner if we chose to. With the popularity of the Internet, we are able to connect with people all over the world to discuss and meet for a variety of reasons, including role-playing.

Role-playing is simply acting out your fantasies in real life. With few exceptions, it does not matter what the fantasy, there is always someone out there that has the reciprocal role of that same fantasy.


The more popular fantasies include:

Nurse/patient
Policeman/criminal
Teacher/student
Interrogator/prisoner
Kidnapper/victim

This is a very short list of role-play roles that can be taken. The list is as great as the imagination. With a little ingenuity, you can be anything you want to be within a role-play scenario. Of course I caution that this, like any other type of play, requires in-depth negotiation as well as complete aftercare, dependent upon the needs of the bottom.

It is of great importance when setting up role-play scenarios that you negotiate completely. There is nothing like getting into the middle of a scene and hitting a trigger that you did not know was there. This can lead to some serious problems as well as stopping what could have been a great, fulfilling scene. Make sure that you know your play partner's limits and anything that should be avoided.

It is also important, especially if you are doing some type of kidnapping scene or something of this nature in a play party setting, to let the Dungeon Monitor or host of the party know about the scene ahead of time. That way others are aware and do not step into your scene thinking there is something non-consensual occurring.

Role-play has been quite rewarding for a lot of people, myself included. If you have the chance to experience some of these scenes, by all means do so. I think you will find your sex life, as well as play experience, as a whole will become a lot more enriched and fulfilling. Be what you want to be -- and have fun doing it.