I am a newbie to this site and BDSM. I have always had what I thought of as darker desires that I never shared with my previous lovers. I now understand why I always found my relationship lacking. I was neither true to them or myself.
I am looking to make some friends, a mentor or maybe someday something more. I seek knowledge and guidance. I would be elated to hear from anyone that has anything that they would like to share with me.
I would describe myself as a strong, independent, intelligent woman. I work and attend college. I am pursuing my second degree. I also have children. So these are just a few things to give you a general idea about me. Please feel free to ask me anything. Although, I do lean toward the submissive side, please be respectful in your contact.
Some ground rules:
1. Until negotiations have been settled and I have stated so I am NOT your sub/slave/kajira. Do not think that because I am considering you or that you are considering me that you have the right to control me in any way, shape or form. Most Dom/Masters understand this well and have been very mature in their communications. However, there has been a few who have almost ruined it for the rest of you.
2. You will need and are expected to earn my respect and adoration if I am expected to submit to you. I am trusting you with something very precious, my body, mind & soul. I need to have the highest degree of trust for me to relinquish control to you. This is a process.
3. I have a protector/mentor. He is an experienced Dom and a good friend. He has earned my respect and trust. I seek His counsel in most everything including kink and vanilla world. Do not think by attempting to discredit Him you will fool me into thinking you are wiser. Even if you are, He is one of my closet friends. He only wants me to be safe and well cared for, like a big brother or father. His job is to find all your flaws and pull you apart. Rest assured, He will do just that. He does his job well. However, He simply counsels and the choice is mine. We all have flaws. If your intentions are good, you won't have any problems.
4. I am an independent, intelligent and hard working woman. I have high standards of honor and integrity. I will not be broken but must surrender naturally or not at all.
Most Dom/Masters have agreed and supported my feelings on this subject. If you don't agree then we simply will not be a good fit and there is nothing wrong with that. It just means we seek something different and it is best we found out now instead of wasting our time and generate ill will.