knowing me is not needed, your force only leads you farther from the truth.... how many times will we go down the same path, in search of one... or of many.... who say "i know you girl"... the one who may say it in honesty, not in what foolishness they have convinced themselves of. i am not a slave, not anymore. i was never submissive. no, no one will change that. i am not broken, i am not confused, i am not lost. i need no assistance, i seek no safety, no ease, i have no desire to hide from myself or others. yet i continue, to search without hope of success that i may find one like me. of my mind, so that the mold must no longer be restructured.... so there must no longer be a battle of will, my success in that will be never ending and it has grown to be a tiresome feat... i need a rest from this expectation, i shall give it to myself, that i may find others with my energy to share existence, a fraction of time. someone who will push me, when i've done all the pushing for too long.
[if254 1]
My Ideal Person:
the impossible, someone similar to me... a friend that has the same energy, a similar background... one that wouldn't need to be shared. we both just know what we are... yeah pretty sure you actually have to build up to that, have acquaintances and shit... dont want to waste my time with that. and really anyone like me wouldnt likely respond to this... so hmmm maybe i should say what qualities a "friend" might have: you like to play games of truth or dare that go ridiculously too far, make up codes of honor and hold too them for a day then a new set the next, can sit and have a moment of reflection then forget it and do something crazy the next, cant slow down unless standing still, will push bad jokes way past the time they are appropriate, feels 100 but will never grow up, will never want anything other than everything they dont have, and can come up with another thing to add to this list.
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