I have had bondage and forced sex fantasies forever and have never had a partner really willing to explore them. I am not really submissive by nature, so it is imperative that I have true respect for my partner. I value intelligence, linguistic ability (in English, please), and physical strength. I have no respect for a man who isn't stronger than I am physically, and if you have to resort to yelling or swearing to try to "be in charge" there is no way I will give in. But someone who can physically overpower me or who simply gives me an order knowing it will be obeyed or who takes me in hand and "gently forces" me to his/her will.... oooh, I just melt. The idea of being helpless, forced to serve, teased, tormented and then used is an incredible turn on. In my experiences so far, I have more often found myself as the dominant partner and that has appeal too sometimes, but that isn't really what I want. I want to be completely controlled. I have no patience with a weak top and am compelled to take the top position if my partner isn't holding it with adequate assurance. But that isn't really where I want to be. So far I have met up with one gentleman who fit the bill of what I was looking for fairly closely and he has put me through my paces a bit. And the experience was more mind-blowing than I could have anticipated. I am now exploring in more depth what my needs and desires really are, and refining what it is that I am seeking. I am discovering that I have a real need to be bound and helpless, and that not knowing or being able to see exactly what is coming deepens the experience. I am discovering that a pain mixed in with the pleasure exponentially heightens the pleasure. I am looking forward to seeing where my exploration takes me next... Please note that I am married and my husband doesn't know about this so discretion is a must. I love my husband but our sex life is virtually non-existant and I either need to find satisfaction elsewhere or get a divorce - and I don't want a divorce, so here I am. I am told I am pretty and believe it is true, but I am not thin and I'm in no danger of being recruited to be a magazine model anytime soon. If you are looking for single, LTR, perfect body, cheerleader type, etc., I am not your girl. If you are looking for a sometime playmate with intelligence, imagination, real beauty (not the canned and airbrushed variety), and a sense of humor as well as a real desire to be bound and dominated, then perhaps we should talk.
[if254 1]
My Ideal Person:
I am looking for someone intelligent, mentally stable, discreet, and trusworthy who can help me continue the exploration of my darker fantasies. A strong Dom with a gentle voice who can gently bend me to his/her will and who will use me for our mutual pleasure. S/He must also have imagination, a sense of humor, and the ability and willingness to acurately communicate his/her desires and understand mine. S/He will need to be able to host (as I cannot) and should be in the South bay area. I am open to trying getting together with a couple as long as he is dominant - she can be domme, bi, or switch.
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